The Turkey Chronicles – Thanksgiving Countdown – Episode 1 – The Birds Are Not Ok!
🚨 BREAKING NEWS: The birds are not OK. 🦃💥”
I’m Indiana, your field reporter, and welcome to the Situation Room: your daily countdown to Thanksgiving. ⏳
Let’s rewind. Thanksgiving began 400 years ago…
A tale of pioneer grit, courage, generosity, and gratitude. 🤝🍂
Beautiful story. Heartwarming stuff. Fast-forward to today?
Things have gotten… complicated.
Did you know wild turkeys used to run 25 miles per hour? 🏃♂️💨
And fly at 55 miles per hour?! 🛩️ Yes, 55! They were basically feathery fighter jets. And then, selective breeding and captivity happened. Someone decided to make them: slower, less aerodynamic, and plumper!
Which brings us right back to the Situation Room. 🎙️🦃
BREAKING NEWS: The birds are officially NOT OK.
Turkeys have noticed unusual human activity this month.
Oven cleanings. Butter hoarding. Cranberry stacking. 🧈🛒🫐
Suspicion levels: elevated. Anxiety levels: rising.
Tension in the coop? Rising faster than Butter sales in the Month of November 🍞📈
This is Episode 1 of the Turkey Chronicles. The countdown to Thanksgiving has begun. And trust me, the birds know something is coming. 😨🍽️
Stay tuned. Episode 2 drops tomorrow. Same time. Same situation room. More breaking Turkey news 🦃.
Liked this story? Let’s brew the next one together. ☕
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